Having modded internet forums in the past I totally get it, especially anything queer related is going to attract just the absolute trash of the internet. It’s legitimately distressing for many people to see that shit all day even if you’re getting paid for it, but on a volunteer basis? It’s basically a miracle anywhere is modded at all, much less in a timely manner.
It sounds like there were some jackasses on that server. There’s probably someone smarter than me that’s explored the concept of forum moderation as emotional labor which is expected to be performed and devalued; but in lieu of that I’ll just say don’t discount the effort you put in. If it was so easy everyone could do it then there would never be a lack of mods or disagreement about modding (which, LMAO).