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euphoric_cat ,
@euphoric_cat@lemmy.blahaj.zone avatar

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  • Oha ,
    @Oha@lemmy.ohaa.xyz avatar

    centimeters.

    ReveredOxygen ,
    @ReveredOxygen@sh.itjust.works avatar

    0.3

    Death ,

    Since it's US I'm guessing it's either 0.3 washing machine or 0.3 groundhog

    Klear ,

    Crashes.

    thedirtyknapkin , (edited )

    I once got food delivered to a work site and it took like 15 minutes of go the last mile. Slowly walking all the way up the entrance drive to this place (it was a museum on the waterfront with like 1/2 mile of driveway before the parking lot) turns or he blew a tire and decided to walk it the last mile because he was almost there.

    I felt so bad. He should've just looked after himself... I'm guessing the app would've punished him with a suspension or something if he failed to deliver though. Wanted to tip more after all that, but there was no option to posthumously raise the tip in app and I wasn't carrying cash.

    Guess that's what happens when your boss is a robot.

    FancyLad ,
    @FancyLad@lemmy.world avatar

    Posthumously....so he died? Rip loyal delivery driver

    nifty ,
    @nifty@lemmy.world avatar

    The request ended, may it rest in peace

    thedirtyknapkin ,

    The food kinda died

    Perfide ,

    He should've just looked after himself... I'm guessing the app would've punished him

    Unfortunately, that is a possibility. I used to doordash, canceling an order before you pick up the food is NBD, but canceling after you have picked it up is likely at least a strike against the dashers account.

    nxdefiant ,

    The Deliverator belongs to an elite order...

    MoonRaven ,
    @MoonRaven@feddit.nl avatar

    Obviously, don't forget to tip.

    xantoxis ,

    "Here's a tip, kid: you can tear off a shirt sleeve to form a crude tourniquet!"

    [grabs bag and walks away]

    Lennard ,

    Is this real?

    CluckN ,

    Yeah you can pay a little extra to get them cremated

    nexguy ,
    @nexguy@lemmy.world avatar

    I read that early on there was a bug and you could get them cremated without them being in an accident.

    SkaveRat ,

    Ah yes, the orbital laser bug

    x4740N ,
    @x4740N@lemmy.world avatar

    Thanks for nearly waking my parents up with loud laughter

    SoleInvictus ,
    @SoleInvictus@lemmy.world avatar

    Why are they laughing in your parent's house?! That seems a little concerning.

    ohlaph ,

    Next time don't masturbate in their bed.

    Potatos_are_not_friends ,

    Eww no I already tipped them 20%

    notannpc ,

    Nah. That account posts a lot of “app features” like this as a joke.

    Bennettiquette ,

    thank you. i really should have picked that up by the “send flowers” upsell. can you imagine? in a unlikely set of circumstances, the additional option to have said flowers delivered could trigger a rather unfortunate infinite loop.

    tiramichu ,

    Bold of them to assume the door-dasher can afford hospital

    Potatos_are_not_friends ,

    Welp, better put them out of their misery

    EfreetSK ,
    @EfreetSK@lemmy.world avatar

    "Packaging was damaged and there were several blood stains on it. Driver didn't even say 'Hi', just laid there. Rude and unacceptable! 1/5 *"

    THE_MORTAL ,
    @THE_MORTAL@lemmy.today avatar

    Worst delivery everr

    BigDaddySlim ,
    @BigDaddySlim@lemmy.world avatar

    Door dash: "Sorry about your negative experience, here's a $1.27 refund on your $46.77 order.
    Also, don't forget to send flowers to your dasher's hospital room!"

    Sianna ,

    DoorCrash

    Crashdash

    Afghaniscran ,

    Floordash

    Roadrash

    Skullgrid ,
    @Skullgrid@lemmy.world avatar

    feels very slapdash

    Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In ,

    First chapter of Snowcrash

    TheRealLinga ,

    I tried reading this recently... only made it through a few chapters. Something about the writing style made it hard for me to see the story in my minds eye

    Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In ,

    The lead character being Hero Protagonist gives away the tongue in cheek style.

    It's worth reading for the first ideas of "the metaverse " but plotwise you don't need to finish it.

    Yrt ,

    Did he send flowers?

    Viking_Hippie ,

    No, but the Doordasher realized that they can buy themself flowers

    Potatos_are_not_friends ,

    Yeah, ordered another doordasher to deliver it

    EdibleFriend ,
    @EdibleFriend@lemmy.world avatar

    But then that driver was eaten by a bear :(

    smeenz ,

    Should have selected the bear repellent upsell

    matlag ,

    The flowers were delivered by Doordash
    The victim arrived in an Uber ambulance.

    The part-time doctor (student) mentioned that the hospital's rooms are now managed by Airbnb.

    250$ of tips were collected along the process, but now it's not clear who pocketed them.

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